After our dog died, we got another dog who is as wild as they come. My friend told me I should start watching a show on Animal Planet with a “dog whisperer” but I am convinced I really need a megaphone and tazer. She is still a bit crazed and a bit spoiled. My two fingers are bruised, I have a swollen knee and big biceps from trying to handle her on a leash. Looks like I should have waited a few months because…
My sister-in-law’s dog just had eight pups due to the fact that they didn’t spay her soon enough after her last litter of nine pups. Of that litter, they decided to keep a male. He has grown up nicely and they didn’t see that coming in enough time to get him fixed. Consequently, they have Jerry Springer spaniels.
The mother is also the grandmother to her pups and their father is also their brother. My kids and their cousins spent the better part of last night debating if he is their half-brother or a full brother. Of course he is half brother – his father was a different dog. Duh! I was going to save them some time and cut in with that little fact but it was too much fun watching them trying to draw a canine family tree which proved to be all they needed to settle the argument. (No thrown chairs. No screaming. No tears. No DNA test needed.)
That is how I got my jollies last night. I used to go out and eat a nice meal, have a few drinks with friends and listen to music or see a movie. Now, I watch unmoderated debates about inbreeding. Where is Jim Lehrer when you need him?
“Inbreeding is how we get championship horses.” ~ Louisana state representative
This past weekendÂ we went to see Beauty andÂ the Beast (at ArtParkÂ in Lewiston, NY). IÂ had not expected that halfÂ ofÂ the audience to be underÂ age 10Â with manyÂ of them deckedÂ outÂ in full BelleÂ regalia. TheyÂ wereÂ soÂ cute! The other majority of the audience arrived in busloads from senior centers all across Western New York. They were cute too.
We bought the play tickets about 2 months ago. I had no idea then that I would be living with a beast who I am trying to train to be a beautyÂ atÂ thisÂ time. We got aÂ new dog -Â Â wellÂ sort of. SheÂ is a 2 year-old black lab, weighing in at a whopping 80 pounds of pure energy. She is nutsy and has more in common with Tigger than anything else. That’s whatÂ we ened up calling her – Nutsy.
The kidsÂ are just now understandingÂ why I didn’t wantÂ to getÂ aÂ new puppy. If theyÂ think my NutsyÂ isÂ a lotÂ ofÂ work, just imagine what a puppy would be like. They wanted cute: I wanted a good old dog.
I gotÂ herÂ this ballÂ onÂ a ropeÂ thing and sheÂ isÂ insaneÂ with joy when she plays withÂ it.Â Â It was worth the $15 for the amount of P&V she burns off playing with it. (What’s that? You who don’t know what P&V stands for? Consider yourself youngerÂ than me. That membership in that club is getting bigger daily.)
And speaking of P&V, IÂ am goingÂ to possibly my last tennis lessonÂ tomorrow. I am playingÂ with peopleÂ considerably youngerÂ than myself including a 15-year-oldÂ snot who hasÂ theÂ mannersÂ of a goatÂ and isÂ inÂ worse shapeÂ than myself, who freely admits that I am more decades older than him than I care to admit. I want to smack him up but I am not the teacher and it’s driving me crazy. It does motivate me make him run around the court chasing balls from left to right. Is that mean and immature? YepÂ and itÂ willÂ continue until he learnsÂ toÂ respect this elder.
So, this week I amÂ using the “tireÂ them into submission with a ball” trainingÂ techniqueÂ to trainÂ both beasts. I am confident itÂ willÂ workÂ with atÂ leastÂ one. She will work for bones.
“I never teach my pupils; I only attempt to provide the conditions in which they can learn.“Â – Albert Einstein